Control

Practicing my five techniques repeatedly yesterday was a great way to practice consistent control and purity of my techniques. It does not translate as well if I just pull my strikes short. I also can't strike with full power as it would not be conducive to multiple practices as my partner would not appreciate it. This is where striking without penetrating is so important and the control to do so. 

This is the difference of a black belt, not only to have the skill behind the technique but also to have the control and mindfulness to avoid doing anything by accident. This is the difference I am continually striving for in the final weeks of my grading. 

It is easy to get carried away when you are tired, there is music and people are watching, but this is where consistent practice comes in. Slow down and take the ego out of the equation. 

Different Partners

Since the grading and with demo practices underway, I have been encouraged to practice my 5 personal applications on different partners. I feel that my applications have improved greatly because of this due to a few factors.

In demonstrating and explaining a technique to someone new, I am forced to evaluate the intent of the move and the efficacy of it. I found new ways to execute the same technique to produce a better result. Much like in writing, by verbalizing what I intend to do I find potential flaws or weak spots in my technique that I did not even realize were there. Teaching is the best way to learn.

New partners do not react the same way because they don't know exactly what to expect. Even after a few repetitions the reaction is still different. This is because of the fact that their bodies are not the same. Different heights, different ages, flexibility, injuries, etc. No two people are exactly alike and it really shows in how they react.

It also forced me to slow down, something that I need to work on across the board in terms of my kung fu, perhaps with everything in general. By slowing down, I can make better use of my eye for detail, further finding pros and cons. Digging deeper into what I am doing and why.

The Christmas break has begun and this will hopefully give me time to practice more and reflect on this. Have a great Christmas everyone, enjoy the time with your loved ones!

Reality

My brother recently purchased a VR (virtual reality) headset. Of course I had to give it a try and I found that it was very interesting and quite immersive. The one thing that struck me since trying it out was how amazed I was with the environment around me. This got me thinking, why not be amazed by the world around us in NON virtual reality? I am not entirely sure why this thought came to me, but I'm thankful it did.

This was a reminder for me. We need to remember just how fortunate we are to be alive in the first place. Our planet is in a "sweet spot" in the universe. Close enough to our solar system's star that we do not freeze yet far enough away that we do not burn up. Life flourishes on our little blue planet, our little spot in the vast universe. How many other planets have the same very specific environment?

Part of being mindful and present is allowing yourself to amazed and grateful at the miracle that we are here today. I have a proposition for anyone reading this, take a moment and just look around you. Feel where you are with all your senses, soak it all in. Breathe in the air, touch where you are sitting right now, listen mindfully to everything around you. We are very lucky to be here.

This is one of the many gifts I have received from Kung Fu and the I Ho Chuan. The ability to cultivate and analyze these thoughts and share them.

Personal Journeys

When training, we can get caught up on how well we are doing in comparison to those around us, sometimes to the point where we become discouraged. As a society, we put a lot of stock in how well someone is doing relative to the next person. After all, competition is what drives innovation and gives us a base of what is to be expected.

This being said, when you are training, you need to focus on what you are doing, do not become preoccupied by someone else's progress. Their journey is different than yours, their experience is different than yours. The more you focus on your own progress and what you can do to improve yourself, the better you will develop as a martial artist and as a person in general. You will strive to improve for the sake of improving, not to attempt to shoot ahead of someone else. 

However, with competition comes inspiration. Be aware of where others are around you and draw inspiration from them. Rather than comparing, take what you see or hear as a way to possibly better yourself. Use their success as motivation to succeed yourself. It can become very easy to begin resenting yourself or those who are more proficient, but you cannot take their success personally. They are not succeeding just to put you down, they are successful because they are focused on their goal and have a tangible plan to make it a reality. 

Great Day

I had an amazing day yesterday. The grading is an experience like no other. I learned so much about myself, my strengths and weaknesses. The day was full of good insight and self reflection. How we were by tested by each master instructor was unique and exciting, it was a look into their own viewpoint and their approach to teaching and evaluating kung fu.

I am happy with how the day went, I enjoyed myself and took in all that I could, keeping as positive and receptive as possible. I wanted to miss out on nothing, remaining 100% engaged and present. There were high points and low points in my performance, which I have a plan to rectify and will be following through. I have much to work on still, but with the insight I received and some further guidance, I will correct my errors. 

I want to publicly thank all the black belts who took the time to make this grading possible. You took time out of your busy lives to help us. You were there simply for Mr. Ward and myself. I cannot express enough how grateful I am to have mentors that are so dedicated to their students.

Double Edged Sword

Increasing innovation in technology is a double edged sword. On one hand, it allows us to stay connected and learn anything we want just with a few simple clicks or taps. Our ability to treat ailments or even prevent them is unprecedented, truly amazing! We can travel around the world, experience other cultures first hand and maintain international friendships. 

Devices are so much easier to use, appliances that were reserved for only the upper class are readily available and affordable, making the rush of everyday life a little easier to handle. You don't even need to type into your phone, just ask it a question and it gets to work for you, just like Star Trek!

On the other hand, we are beginning to rely too much on it. Basic skills are being forgotten, awareness and courtesy are dwindling. Common sense is becoming less and less common. Almost everyone sits and stares at their phones for a good portion of their waking hours, it is the first thing most of us see in the morning and the last thing we look at at night. 

Vehicles with sensors that tell us information we can easily see if we just look outside the windshield and just pay attention, some that even make driving corrections for us! It lowers the bar, our driving skills are atrophying. I understand the intent of auto makers creating vehicles that are more safe, but it in fact doing the opposite, turning vehicles into mobile entertainment centres rather than modes of transportation.

The relevance this has to kung fu is the increasing need for instant gratification. Most of us are so used to getting what we want right now that we are not willing to take the time and put in the hard work to achieve what we want. When you are learning something right now that might not actually be truly understood for 30 years, most people will turn to something else, favoring the next exciting thing, something with instant result with little effort. Kung fu means hard work, hard work that must be done over a long period of time in order to truly benefit from it.  

Training at Home

For the past month, life has become slightly busier for Mel and I. Mel returned to work on an evening, part-time basis. This being the case, I was given an opportunity to spend much more one on one time with Claire on Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings. This has been amazing for our bonding, I also feel more confident in caring for her needs and addressing any issues that arise.

At first this did affect my training, I was not yet adept at handling it all at once and I have not been able to participate in the Monday/Wednesday classes. However I soon discovered that she is quite amazed and mesmerized by Kung Fu. I began by including her in my push ups and sit ups, soon she was excited every time I practiced forms and techniques in the living room in front of her, particularly the flying kicks! She is even entertained by Tai Chi.

It is a great feeling having the chance to share my training with Claire, I am fortunate and grateful that she enjoys it so much. I also practice my time management and mindfulness in my training, no wasted time, baby won't let it happen. She is quite the taskmaster and I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Inspired by a Master

Tonight we were honored to have Master Ben Ma visit the kwoon and teach. Master Ben Ma has been practicing Kung Fu since 1962. He began with Hung Gar then later moved to Praying Mantis Tai Chi. He still trains everyday and teaches five days a week, truly an inspiring person. Afterwards he gave us a brief introduction to these two styles that he has trained in for over 50 years! He also gave us some thought provoking advice. Much of what he said to us resonated with what we attempt to achieve through our training. This is not just in our Kung Fu itself, but our approach to it and all the other aspects of our lives. Everything he said reinforced why we train in the first place.

One point he made that stuck with me the most was regarding ego and letting go of what you think you know. This allows you to recognize a lesson right in front of you, rather than assuming you already know what someone is going to tell you. No technique is perfect, even if you practice it thousands of times, there will always be room for improvement. Let go, open your mind and accept what you may learn.

I am grateful that I was able to take advantage of this opportunity, this reset my perspective and gave me a mental jolt, just in time I might add. I thank Sifu Brinker and Master MacDonald for making this possible.

The Power of the Word

The use of the word is something very powerful, we humans are the only species on the planet to have spoken and written word, this is something that we take for granted sometimes. What we say, both to ourselves and others carries weight. It can make the difference between success and failure or happiness and sorrow.

The word is used to reinforce thoughts. If we have negative thoughts and express them through the word, it can potentially to steer a situation in a negative direction. Conversely, if we consciously express more positive thoughts with words it can give us confidence we didn't even know we had.

I am focusing on this frequently lately as the grading day is drawing nearer. The self doubt creeps up and attempts to take over, but I cannot let it take control. I am not reinforcing it with negative self talk, as much as I can help. It is very easy to let negativity take the wheel. It is easier to have more positive self talk if I just focus on what I need to do, practice frequently and stay on top of everything in my control to prevent any unwarranted guilt that may manifest.

Assertiveness

I recently began reflecting on my ability to be assertive in conflict. I have difficulty asserting my point of view and effectively making myself heard. If my point of view does not agree with the other party, I often either find a way to acknowledge their view or even allow them to take control of the situation while I remain silent. In my mind I understand my view is valid and can contribute, but if it conflicts with someone else's view I accommodate and avoid in order to prevent any friction or conflict between us. I avoid offending people in order to maintain a good rapport with them.

I am agreeable, I want everyone I come into contact with to be satisfied. I am not a push over, there is a point that I will stand, but it does take a lot to get there. Often when I risk it and try to stand up earlier, I feel I come off as adversarial and unreasonable. I need to begin to concern myself less with this; even with the best intentions, someone is going to be slighted in one way or another. It is futile attempting to please everyone. If someone does not appreciate my point of view and approaches me differently because of it, that is not solely on my shoulders. It is their choice to take something personally.

I need to improve this skill, analyze my intent and come up with ways of articulating my point of view in a manner that benefits both parties, yet allows me to be heard. My spirit needs to be in tune with what I wish to accomplish. Much like sparring in kung fu, I cannot let myself be pushed in a direction I don't want to go, I need to take control. Understand what I can influence and what can influence me.

Narrow it Down

Many of us find it difficult to find something to write about week after week. In fact, I'm sure it happens to us all from time to time. You might even have a subject you have in mind, but are unsure of how to articulate it properly. The image is there, but the words describing it are lost. 

When this happens, you need to recognize that the subject you want to write about may be too general. If it is in fact to general you need to narrow down your focus. For instance, it is easier to describe a building one brick at a time, describing each individual brick, than it is to attempt to just describe the building. Details become easier to describe if you approach it that way.

It is all about what you intend to convey to the reader, your thoughts or opinions. Sometimes, even if you do figure it out and start writing, it does not turn out the way you had intended. This happens, it is part of having a weekly blog. Don't become discouraged, just narrow down on something else next week and try again.

Food Journal

I have participated in the SRKF food journal for 10 day now. The results are eye opening. Overall, I am not eating particularly unhealthy, but it is difficult to gauge when you have 3 Thanksgiving dinners over 2 weekends. I am not one who will let food go to waste, ever. Energy was used, animals died and good people put effort into preparing the food I ate. My eating will balance out again soon, again, I take the left overs to ensure that no food is wasted, food waste is an incredibly annoying pet peeve for me.

One major benefit of the food journal is the public accountability. I can't just stuff myself, healthy food or not, and pretend the whole thing didn't happen. Of course, not without cheating myself by omitting it in my log. That would defeat the whole purpose of the whole journal project, creating a waste of time, mine for writing an untruth and the readers for reading it.

Another benefit I have noticed is my consumption of water. In the past I have not always been the best at hydrating myself properly. I favored coffee, black tea and cocoa's over just a hot water. There is water in all those beverages, but it is not pure, plus the caffeine doesn't help. Our bodies are mostly water, so it only makes sense for me to supply mine with water that it does not have to be filtered through other things to get to. Will I still drink these beverages? Yes, but mindfully and with much more moderation, ensuring that I still drink my required amount of water. Water comes first, the others are just extra.

I am enjoying this food journal and feel that the mindfulness from it will spread to more aspects of my life, only if I remain consistent. 

Spirit

What is spirit? This is a question we were asked tonight in class. Spirit is who you are, what you are willing to do or go through. It is your character, your morals, the drive behind what you do or what you wish to do.

When you are harmonizing your spirit with your intent, you need to ensure that what you intend to do is something you are willing to go through with morally. If your spirit is not in harmony with your intent, you are in for some trouble.

The example of defending yourself against a knife attacker was used.  If someone attacks you with a knife and you defend yourself in such a way that you are in a position to use the knife to kill them, are you willing to do that?  Does the intent of the defense you have in mind compatible with your character?  This is not something to figure out in the last minute, when the blade is already in your hand.

Obviously this is just one scenario, but it did get me thinking about my own spirit.  How driven am I to achieve my goals?  What do I find most value in?  What am I willing to do to get what I want in life?

Pressure

Thanksgiving weekend. 47 days until the grading. This is what is primarily on my mind. I will be honest, I can feel the pressure building. I am going through what I know, doing my best to ensure I not only know it, but have the skill developed to execute it at a level that is sufficient. So why I am letting this pressure build? It is an important day, but remaining calm is my best bet.

Remaining calm AND having a laser focus. It is difficult to get anything accomplished if I try to do too many things at once. If I try to go over everything I know at one time, I will just be maintaining them all, nothing will be improved. However, I am making an effort to take one concept, focus on what I can improve and take time to reflect on what it is I just did. Afterwards, moving on to the next one, focussing solely on it.

I know this is a topic I write about a lot, but as I said, this is always in the front of my mind currently.

Have a happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Ordinariness

I think I finally realize what the purpose of the 2nd degree class is. It is a class for us to work on specific concepts. When I say specific, I mean specific to us individually.

The normal classes are required to continue to work on the broad range of our knowledge base and skill base. The Tuesday class is our chance to narrow it down and really get a feel for what we need to be successful during our final test for black belt.

We need to make this class OUR class. It is not just another class, another hoop to jump. It is a tool, one that I know I have not utilized to its full potential.

Tonight, we were asked to think about what we are least confident with. I knew right away, but have been trying to figure it out as quietly as I could. I did not want people thinking I was not ready for the grading. This hindered my progress.

"A master, rather than condemning himself for his "ordinariness", will embrace his ordinariness and use it as a foundation for building the extraordinary." This sentence in "Mastery" has been stuck in my head a lot lately and is quite relevant to this topic.

Openly facing my lack of confidence in "one steps" allowed me to essentially determine what we covered in class and I got much out of this class because of it.

For instance, the main rational I took from it was no matter what technique or defense you execute, as long as you keep your intent pure to your spirit and the situation, you will find success, one way or another. Think about what is in front of you, not a step by step algorithm that has been pre-determined.

Having a set of pre-determined techniques does have its benefits, it does give us an equal base to work from and build upon. I just need to relax and let my own creativity draw from them, rather than simply get married to them and miss out.

Mindful Decisions

As mentioned in the meeting. I am now working full time, Monday to Friday with set hours. I have not had this in over a year. Now although the schedule is more consistent, I will be taking home less money. I realized that the money is not as important as my time or sanity. We can always reduce our expenses if we look hard enough. 

Too many people literally kill themselves chasing more and more money and I found myself slowly moving toward that path. I was racking my brain for months over the pros and cons of continuing on the path I was on and the one I finally chose, just ask Mel. In the end if reasoned that the balance has to be maintained between wealth and well-being.  This will also be a great benefit to my kung fu, with less distractions, attempting to learn and remember procedures from 3 different jobs, I can put more mental energy into my grading.

Having a public journal will help reduce cost from a food aspect. I can easily eat more than I need in one sitting. Besides, not all the food I eat is what one would consider clean eating. Having what I eat out there for not only myself, but all to see, will be motivation to be more mindful of what I am eating and how much. 

This also increases mindfulness in other aspects of  life. Much like how mediocrity seeps from one part of life to another, mindfulness can do the same thing. It is more difficult as it requires effort, but the effort seems easier as the mindfulness spreads. It starts with food, the main energy source. Mindful eating creates mindful purchasing which creates mindful lifestyle, mindful training, mindful living.

Blocks

I have been reflecting all week on the sparring class we had on Monday. Even though we practice blocks with the intent of using our arm as the contact point, many of us block with our hands instead while sparring.

I thought about it, do I do this as well? I have to honestly say that I probably do, perhaps not all the time, but it definitely happens. Lack of mindfulness is most likely the cause of this. When sparring, when not mentally prepared, all the training goes out the window, so does technique. Shoulders tighten, big, swinging movements start and way more energy is used than necessary.

I have been practicing with the bags, using only my arms to "block" incoming strikes to reinforce the proper arm placement when colliding with another object. When I practice blocks in the air, the intent is always the use of the arm, so I just need to encourage that intent more during application.

Stick

We practiced the stick form tonight. Going through a couple specific movements and expanding on the intent of those said movements. Weapon forms are fun and quite informative. The amplify your intent or lack of intent as well as your alignment and vectoring. This makes them great tools for improving your overall technique and engagement. This is one of my favorite aspects of forms. One analyzes a movement, breaking it down to the logic of it, then applies it to everything else they know.

I had a lot of fun in class. The energy was in the right state. Many of us had great questions and all learned much from the exercises we practiced. I left the kwoon tonight with a sense of euphoria that is rarely generated anywhere else.

Quality over Quantity

I was practicing my kicks for the fitness test on Saturday. My goal was to get a '10' on as many as I could. This is something I have been practicing for months now and have been making progress, but yesterday was an off day. I was making the numbers I wanted to, but I was beginning to lose the technique behind it.

I was so focused on getting the number at any cost that the cost presented itself plainly, lousy quality. I reflected on this after my kicks. It would be better to slow down and get the quality in. It makes no sense to get in 28 spinning back kicks if only 18 of them would be counted. I did one more round of spinning back kicks with this intent in the forefront, I managed to get in 26 and the feel and quality of them were were vastly improved.

Quality over quantity, this is what I will be working on over the next month and a half. Get that solid technique in, then speed it up, then repeat.

Cat Stance

The cat stance is unique and very powerful. Class tonight was dedicated to understanding the importance and purpose of this stance. What makes it powerful is the fact that it utilizes rotation more than any other stance to my knowledge. Imagine pushing down or twisting a spring, there is resistance  because the spring does not just stop you, it rotates. This rotation creates potential energy that is release when you let it go. This is how I visualize cat stances, you redirect, absorb and then release you opponents energy back onto them. This is present in other stances, but is just not as apparent as it is in the cat stance.

The Journey

The journey is always more important than the destination. There will always be another destination to reach as you go about life, but it is the journey that defines you.

The destination is also defined by how you approach your journey. The choices you make affect the outcome. Sometimes we regret decisions we made, wishing we took a different path. The grass is always greener on the other side, but what we don't realize is we would be thinking the exact same thing if things were reversed.

When you just focus on the destination, your life choices are affected. Some people are so focused on the destination that they fail to slow down and truly appreciate the journey, which would provide us more insight to make correct choices.

In kung fu, it is important to embrace where you are in your journey to black belt. This is what will define you as a martial artist.

Leadership

Two qualities of a good leader are leading by example and inspiring those around you. I feel that I am struggling to harness these qualities with regards to my fellow candidates. The journey to black belt would be more meaningful if not taken on my own. It should be one to share with those around me who are on the same part of their journey. 

It is not as fulfilling to go though a grading year without being able to inspire those around me to push themselves as well. It becomes one driven by narcissism and selfish accomplishment. I am striving to earn my black belt, not only because it is something I greatly wish to achieve for myself, but so that I can make a difference to the world around me, and the achievement DOES NOT end when you have that belt around your waist. It merely begins. 

It becomes a symbol of responsibility, that you have achieved something amazing and hold yourself to the same standards you did while working to earn it, inspiring others to do the same. I feel as though I can't inspire my peers now, so how should I expect to inspire others when I become a black belt?

Our journeys are all unique, we are all going through things in life that cannot be compared with. In my particular case, I am a new father, working 3 jobs in a new career (most of which are either out of town or include some evenings) and help teach the kids classes when I can, all during my grading year. I sometimes can't even keep track of what day it is, my schedule is so inconsistent. I cannot commit the time I could have 4 years ago during my first and most successful I Ho Chuan year, but I am making due with the decisions I made, owning them and putting my best effort into it. Simply by doing what was laid out in front of me, piece by piece throughout the year, I am preparing for one of the top 3 most important days of my life. 

If it was easy, everybody would be doing it and the achievement would lose it's value. I will continue to do what I can to help those around me. We are all in this together, let's do this.

 

Blogging

Blogging is a unique I Ho Chuan requirement. It is one of the only requirements that is purely mental. Definitely one of the more difficult requirements for me when I first began my first year with the team. In high school, my least favourite subject was Language Arts. I felt like I could not think of anything compelling to say, that it was not something I would ever be good at. I only went through the classes because I had to and was happier than ever when I found out I was not required to write another essay again after my last final.

Fast forward 5 years to 2014 and I found myself facing my old nemesis, creative writing, again. This time though, it was public writing, my promise to myself and the I Ho Chuan team. As stated before, I was not thrilled about this particular requirement. I felt that I was not the best with words, nervous about what people might think of what I had to say. I made a promise though, and by then in my life, I wanted truly to live up to my word. Through engaged repetition, whether I wanted to or not, I started to develop my skill in writing blogs, week after week. (A couple missed ones, I will admit.)

Does this mean that every blog I wrote was perfect? Absolutely not. However, like anything I do, I make my best effort to improve a little bit each time. There are still times when I hover the mouse over the "publish" button, holding my breath and cringing as I press it, finalizing what might be a fantastic post or indeed something truly cringe worthy.

You don't know unless you take that last step! I am so grateful that this is something we are required to do for a successful I Ho Chuan year. It is a fantastic tool that expands what we learn through words. Reflecting on and sharing our journey with those around us in a unique way. Many take this opportunity we have in front of us for granted. The ability to freely voice our ideas, our experiences and our opinions without fear of being silenced. We have no idea how lucky we are.

If I could go back and tell my 17 year old self what a joy it is to write a blog once, sometimes twice a week for the entire internet to read, he would laugh in disbelief. Oh, how much has changed in such a short time.

The Void

One of the concepts that were taught in class that I wish to explore is "The Void". To anyone reading this, feel free to correct me at anytime. I wish to understand this concept more in a way that can be defined. From my understanding, the void is defined as being aware of everything around you and nothing at the same time. It is not going with the motions, but is actually acting without intellectually reasoning what you are doing. 

You enter the void when you really get into the groove. It sometimes gets to the point when your body starts to take over, naturally doing what it feels is right, what you trained it to do. The void is not limited to when you are practicing kung fu either. You probably go into the void without even knowing it at times in your normal activities.

I believe that recognizing when you are going into the void is the next step in controlling it. When you understand what is happening, the odds are more likely that you can have more say in when it happens and what happens when you are in such a state of mind.

Day Shift

This is the first year I have worked on kwoon maintenance in the mornings during back to school week. This was an interesting experience. Mainly because most of the students participating in the maintenance did so in the evening. We had our small group come in every morning, witness the progress of the evening group and made our own contribution to the progress. Great job team.

This week is a great way to reset your mindset, focus on the building you train in and begin with fresh new momentum for the last few months of the year. This is not just a gym and we are not just working out. We are practicing an ART. An art that is thousands of years old, one that teaches us self awareness as well as awareness of what is around us simply by encouraging an eye for detail through repetition.

I'm happy to have contributed to the kwoon; to give back to the building and more importantly, what it stands for.

Timing

This week I concentrated on my timing. I was reminded on Wednesday morning class that not only is hip engagement important, but WHEN you engage your hip is equally important.

Having proper alignment at the correct time allows for more power behind your strikes and it protects your body from injuries. It doesn't help you if your hip engages too early or too late. Too early and you have less power, too late and you risk injury.

I was really driving this home with my roundhouse kicks after it was noted that my hip was engaging too early on some of my kicks. I think I was just over analyzing the technique and broke it down too far. Once I was reminded of this fact, I corrected my timing and my kicks improved.

There are just over 3 months before grading. Timing is especially crucial from this point on, in my practice and in my routine. 

Ambidextrous

Tonight in class we worked on several applications and techniques. One of which was the helmet crusher. This one is interesting, it is one I have always enjoyed, you can spend many hours of practice just on this technique, perfecting the little details can be overlooked.

I certainly had to put my thinking cap on when it came do doing this technique on the other side. It is not something I do as often as I should apparently. I realize now just how beneficial practicing these kinds of techniques on both sides is. We practices our basics both left and right. Punches, kicks, blocks, etc. This is no different. It builds that muscle memory and skill we need to progress in our art.

Being proficient at your techniques only on one side does not make you truly proficient. Practice ALL your techniques on both sides, you may learn something you did not even know you were lacking.

Experiment

In a section of "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance", the author describes how to properly solve problems through hypothesis and experimentation. This is called scientific method.

The short version is you make a hypothesis of what the problem is, without making assumptions as to the cause. Then you narrow it down bit by bit through more specific hypotheses and experimentation until you either fix the problem or find out what is not causing it.

I had a moment like this yesterday. One of the locals in Falkand needed a hand with their computer. I don't have much experience with computers, but I wanted to help anyway. Perhaps I could figure it out.

I embraced what Robert Pirsig said about scientific method and just approached it one piece at a time. After one "failed" approach I thought to myself how successful that "failure" was. The experiment was not a failure but proof that my approach was not the correct one. I learned from several of these outcomes, eventually finding a solution.

This mindset works only if you learn from your unsuccessful attempts. If you try something the same way over and over expecting different results, you will be disappointed. To be successful, the learning never ends.

Talk About It

Every month we as a team get a chance to sit down face to face and talk things through. We discuss upcoming projects or demos, but we also have a chance to disclose our personal journey. Nothing can replace FACE TO FACE. It is my favorite method of communication because it leaves the least room for interpretation. You can hear how the person is speaking, you can see their body language, you can feel the energy they give off. It's all right there!

So why are so few of us willing share our journey at the meeting, face to face? I tell you it is difficult to share in front of a bunch of strangers, still possible but difficult. However we are not strangers, we are teammates. The more we talk about our life with each other the better we know one another and this then makes it EASIER to speak in front of everyone. We become more than just teammates, we become friends.

Whether it is positive or negative, what you talk about is important. It lets the rest of us in so we can have a better understanding of what you are going through. With understanding we can help, some of us have gone through something similar I am sure. I was there, my first year in the program I was terrified to say anything. "What could I possibly contribute to a conversation with 20 people in it?", but when I started I noticed the eyes looking at me and the ears listening to me. I was acknowledged and it got a little easier every time. I developed the skill through practice. Just like ANYTHING in kung fu or life in general, if you don't consistently practice it you will NOT improve.

I am thankful for everyone who attended, but especially for those who shared their journey yesterday. Let's make a good effort to share more next meeting!

Running

When I was growing up, I enjoyed running. It was something I was naturally good at as well as a great time for me to just ponder things alone. As I got older I stopped, it just became less of a priority for me. Since joining kung fu however, I have slowly rekindled my old passion, especially this year.

I recently created a route, a loop in town that takes me from my house and back that is exactly 2 kilometers. Almost everyday, running this route is the first thing I do in the morning. One part necessary for the dog, other part necessary for my training. It has felt great since I started doing it consistently again, feeling the rhythm of my breath and my feet strike the ground.

I continually try to analyze and improve my technique, whether it is my rhythm, my stride length, etc. This is something I didn't do with my running in the past, but happy to be doing now. It is quite satisfying to restart an activity I loved, with an approach that will improve it and hopefully make it something sustainable for the long term.

Ground Work

We got a chance to work on something that isn't reviewed as often in the 2nd degree class, grappling. Much like anything else in kung fu, the key is in the hips. In order to get yourself out of a mount, nothing short of brute force does not work unless you properly use your hips. Even then, relying on brute force is not guaranteed. Proper use and practice of technique is how you succeed, sounds familiar.

There is much I need to improve with my grappling. I realize now that I took it for granted. After not practicing it on the mats for some time, much of my knowledge has atrophied. However, once reminded of the techniques, I was able to apply them, though not as skilled as I once was able to. This must be addressed.

Tonight was a good reminder that I need to broaden my review of the curriculum to prepare for the grading. I still feel I am doing well, but it could be better. This is why it is vital to attend the other classes during the week. There is a huge difference in reviewing it yourself and participating in a structured class. Sometimes you learn something you did not realize needed learning.

Practicing Together

I got a chance to attend a class this Saturday with Claire on the mats. It was fortunate that it was the Purity and Strength class, one that I was able to improvise and still participate while keeping her calm and quiet as to not distract anyone from the lesson at hand.

I am not able to spend as much time as I would like at home with Claire, so this was a great way for us to spend some time together. The exercises we practiced were quite relaxing. The breathing and relaxation techniques, although slightly modified, not only were beneficial to me internally, but also extended to Claire. My slow breaths calmed me down and in turn calmed her down. With her calm I was able to further concentrate on the exercise, win-win situation for both of us.

So far, she seems to like this type of activity. I have had some success in using Tai Chi as a method of calming her so I am not surprised that she enjoyed this. I am grateful that Sifu Cosgrove and the rest of the class found no issue with her attending. I appreciate the experience we had.

Kung fu means much to me and because of this I am at the kwoon as much as I can, so I am pleased to have shared this with my daughter. I hope to make this a more consistent activity for her. Perhaps what we do at Silent River, on and off the mats, will become a major part of her life as well. 

Breathe

Tonight we worked primarily on our strategies regarding distancing in our sparring. Not only is your own range very important, but your opponent's range as well. Whether their range is longer or shorter than yours, it poses a unique challenge on how you position yourself in relation to them.

I learned much in terms of how to recognize what your opponent might be attempting to accomplish through their body language, as well as how to counteract or exploit it.

During this lesson, I realized that I needed to address something much more basic if I were to actually learn anything. This concept was to breathe properly. While participating in the lesson, I found my breathing was shallow at first, only getting air into the top half of my lungs. This is one of the reasons why we teach the sound focus, to expel all the air in your lungs in order to force yourself to take a full breath.

As soon as I recognized this I paused for a moment to reset myself, remind myself of the importance of good, full breaths, how those full breaths will keep me calm and give me more power. I slowed my breathing, but increased the quality of each breath, allowing me to embrace and respond to the lesson that was being taught.

Mediocrity

I have been working hard since joining kung fu to minimize the mediocrity in my life. I look back and accept the fact that I let quite a bit of it rule how I lived. I lived by the idea that the less you have to concentrate on, the better, this makes for a simple life. I don't think I was lazy, but I just did not apply myself as well as I could have. Now I know I could not have been more wrong.

Mediocrity sneaks up on everyone. We are not always so accepting of this fact and try to defend our habits. We see that someone is trying to correct us in something that we feel we know all there is to know. It is an attack at our very identity. 

Once we accept that we don't know everything about ANYTHING, we can receive new ideas, correction or even criticism with an open mind. By letting go of what you think you know, you can broaden you knowledge greatly.

The only thing worse than willingly accepting mediocrity is being adversarial when new ideas come by that might improve what you are doing. 

80

80 hours. That is the estimated amount of training hours we have left until grading. This is a rough calculation of 5 hours of training a week over 4 months. This is not much time, the equivalent of just over 3 days. If I trained non-stop for 80 hours, grading would be early Saturday morning. Whoa!

What does this information do for me? It is a constant reminder to take consistent action. Don't waste or squander any time. Not consistent mindless action either. Mindful, meaningful action that propels me forward. It is a reminder to take every free moment to improve.

Like with anything we learn, this also translates into everything we do. If we increased the quality of everything we do, even something as mundane as brushing our teeth, our mindset will naturally be that of constant self improvement. With this it will get easier over time, but only if there is a true commitment made to do so.

The Skill of Awareness

A big theme for me this week has been situational awareness. Wherever you are, you need to be aware of what is around you. This is common knowledge, but it is not always practiced.

This comes down to an eye for detail. Extending your eye for detail from yourself to your surroundings. Making note of every little piece of information and consciously being aware of it's affect.

A method I use to improve this is creating an inner narrative about what I see, hear, smell, etc. Almost like a book I try to describe the object or activity with as much detail as I can put words to. Not only does this practice increase my awareness, but it also grounds me and forces me to be present, a double affect.

Being aware of where you are and what you are doing is an important skill to have. Like any skill it requires constant practice, you can say you KNOW about awareness, but knowing and the ability to DO are very different. Look around you and really take in what you see. Practice makes the master.

Promise

There is a promise you make when you join kung fu, intending to earn your black belt and beyond. You make a promise that you will consistently do your best. You will develop the knowledge AND the skill at a standard that represents you and those who came before you. There is a difference in mindset between a white belt and a black belt, this is consistent eye for detail.

By the time you are grading you need to be sure that you have fulfilled your promise. I feel I have done my best to do this, but know there is more I can do to prepare. Even if I am consistent now, it might not be enough if I am not consistent on the day of the grading. 

This being said, the more consistent I am now, with my training, my eye for detail and my blogs, I am confident I will be successful. I will be sure to use the tools given to me, to turn the gifts of knowledge into skill, to convince those around me that I will be successful as well.

Sludge

The subject of food, how much and what kind to eat, was discussed a couple of times this week. It makes sense that this is a very important factor in your training, for multiple reasons.

Food is the fuel for your body, what you put into your body eventually becomes part of it. If you are eating nothing but junk, your body will react accordingly. Your performance will diminish because your body is too busy working through all that junk, trying to extract any usable nutrients and getting rid of the sludge.

How much you eat is just as important. Again, if your body is too busy working through unnecessary food, it takes energy away from what you want to do otherwise. It is also a work of willpower. The more you practice your willpower, only eat what you need, refrain from overindulging, it will eventually become an ingrained habit, something that you don't need to consciously think about. 

This is definitely something I need to work on. I am known as the guy who will just keep eating. Famous for not letting food go to waste. But is it worth it? Is there a better way to handle it?  Packing it up and eating it later for instance, or just saying no even though it is almost a collective agreement that I will say yes to seconds. 

What can I say, I love food. However, there is a mindful way to eat and still enjoy what I eat. I am young and fit now, but if I don't look ahead and realize my metabolism won't be this lightning fast forever, I could cause a lot of problems in the next couple decades. That is not what I want for my future.

Out of the Kwoon

I received some advice from a supervisor that was familiar to me. He spoke of taking the attitude you have on duty, the image you want to show, the attitude you want to have in emergency services, and take it out into the rest of your life. He stated that you can't just stop when your shift ends, you need to live it, make it part of who you are everywhere you go. It won't work if you only do this some of the time, it has to be consistent, it has to be ALL the time. This mindset sounds akin to one we embrace in kung fu. I was delighted to see that this idea is present in other groups and occupations. 

The first time I heard about the concept of "out of the kwoon and into the world" was at the 2015 Alabama Martial Arts Build-Vention. Master Tom Callos made clear the importance of taking what you learn on the mats, in terms of mindset and awareness, and taking it out into your community. You learn patience, humility and empathy when you train. Why not take these principles and make it part of who you are as a person? If you don't, you need to analyze why you are training in the first place. Whether it is to improve yourself for the benefit of those around you as well, or simply for narcissistic reasons. Try your best, stay humble, recognize when you can give a hand.

This whole idea made a significant impact on my approach to training and to life in general, early on in my martial arts journey. It is something I have gratitude for and reflect on every day.

Applications

We were reminded tonight about the value of applying what you learn in one technique or application and applying it to all of them. When you learn a concept, you need to be flexible with it. It is a concept, not specific. This allows you to change your intent midway between techniques while maintaining flow.

It is not a formula like a+b=c. There are so many variables that you cannot get married to a single set of movements. This closes so many options to you and leaves you shorthanded in the long run. I am working on this idea, especially with the combinations and applications that I am comfortable with. I sometimes find myself rushing through, thinking that I had such great flow. My intent sometimes skips to the end because I "know" how it is going to end already. 

Splitting up my intent into smaller bite sized pieces is my goal, no matter how proficient I get, there will always be room for improvement. This is the beauty of kung fu.

Time

Time is a commodity, probably the only pure commodity we have. There are no exchange rates, no returns or refunds, no interest. Once it is used you cannot get it back, all transactions are final.

I have reflected this week on how I utilize my time. It could be better, but I am not entirely wasteful. I have this habit of taking on so much at once that it could be perceived that I don't have enough time, but when I truly apply myself I find I have more than I realized. Again, to use the currency analogy, you would be surprised where you can find lost money. Under the couch, in drawers, in a motorcycle jacket you haven't touched in months. Same idea with time, let's be honest, how much idle time do we spend on our phones? My guess would be more than you think. How much time do you think is wasted when we doddle and are not mindful of what we are doing? Again, could be more than we think.

It is about deciding what is worth doing, what will I benefit from, what will make me a better person, what will help me help those around me. My reflection this week has concluded that I was not using my time to it's fullest. I am not as mindful as I could be in what I am doing, it takes longer than it should to complete some tasks.

On the flip side, I have made some incredible progress, especially these last few months, to squeeze in what I can. Yesterday is a great example, between kung fu training, taking care of my family, yard work and courses for my job, I accomplished a great amount in little time. It is possible! I maintained the right mindset. I just kept going, I did not let my momentum slow, but I also savored the moments as they passed. Weird, trying to get things done while stopping to smell the roses, sounds contradictory doesn't it? But somehow it worked, I will continue reflecting to find out how.

I would guess that most of us could benefit from having a look and recognizing habits that don't constitute to an efficient use of time. The more efficient you are, the more you accomplish, the more successful you are and the better you feel.

Strategies

There are strategies to make the most of our time, critical thinking is a big one. To attribute this to kung fu I will use the example of training.

When you want to decide if you should train or not you need to look at the big picture. Ask yourself what benefits you are looking for in this particular training session and what potential benefits or consequences there would be from not training.

If the reason for you not to train is you are too tired, that is not good enough. Trust me, I used that reasoning before. Tired or not, there are so many things you can practice that will benefit your skill and knowledge in the future.

Another strategy is to break it down into microscopic pieces. For instance, working on a specific technique to improve body memory or your understanding if the concept can be done, tired or not. You go over the movement, visualize how it could be applied and practice it.

Finally, I find just talking to someone helps greatly. Bounce ideas back and forth or ask for clarification. I learned that when you verbalize what you are thinking, it boosts your higher brain function and allows you to work things through logically. Blogging also falls into this category. I find most of my insights are reinforced by what I am writing.

Next Step

I will be taking another big step in my new career tomorrow, beginning my orientation in Edmonton which will hopefully transition into a more full-time position.

It has been almost a year since I worked in a true full-time position. To be honest, we have done quite well considering. The less you have, the less you spend, the more creative you need to be to make ends meet. It also helps that we have such a great support structure, for this I am grateful.

I will do my best to not let my new career affect my training. Keeping my routine and my vision for the future intact will be my best bet in accomplishing this. I have failed to adequately manage my time to make such a thing possible several times in the past, but failure is not an option anymore. I will not fail my kung fu and I will not fail my family.

Farmer's Day

It was great to see so many of our team taking part in the parade yesterday. It is a great opportunity to get some real lion dance practice in, while having a little bit of fun with it and I'm happy we had a good group who were eager to get back into the lions. The demo afterwards turned out well. The last minute demos are always great because they are different every time. Good job on the lion dance Mr. Bergstreiser and Sifu Meier, that first solo dance is the most memorable.

I learned much from my board break attempt. For instance, my knife hand does in fact work. I admit it was the one I was worried about the most and when I broke that board, I was surprised at just how easy it was. I was in so much awe about this success that I did not position the following kick properly. This is most unfortunate, but it is a great learning tool. They are not this evil impenetrable mass, just a small piece of wood that, with the knowledge and skill I have developed, should be no problem to break. It's all in the mind. I psyched myself out, it will not happen again. 

So I look forward to Canada Day when I can make my next attempt. I will use the time to learn from this and become successful.

A big thanks to Mr. Bjorkquist and Mrs. Kohut for providing the trailer and transportation, you two continue to be inspirational members of this team. Thank you everyone who came out, you made this successful day possible.

Inaction

Inaction is something that plagues our society today. Why do anything when someone else will do it instead if you wait long enough? We missed a terrific opportunity this weekend with the form seminar. I believe this is due to inaction. Only 6 que belts responded that they would attend. There were some who responded that they can't go, but where are the rest?

The form seminar is an opportunity to learn a form you may not have before or improve one you do know; Then after all of that, present it in front of black belt judges. I remember my first form seminar as a yellow belt, I was still learning the Tai Chi form and felt a little overwhelmed with both it and the regular kung fu classes. When I presented my form (kempo 1), one of the judges mentioned how much Tai Chi helped me with this. This inspired me to continue with Tai Chi, year after year.

I know the loss of this opportunity is due to my inaction as well, had I been promoting it more, writing a post similar to this a month ago, there may have been a chance more would have joined up.

So I will say this, we have another extra-curricular opportunity next weekend, Farmer's Day parade. This is a good way to meet your classmates and instructors while representing Silent River as we tour the town. This is unique as it puts us out there to the whole community of Stony Plain, plus throwing candy at the kids from inside the lion is always great. Hope to see you there.

Fire

This weekend I took a short trip to BC to get some land surveying done. A lot of fun was had on this trip and we completed what we wanted to. On my way back, I was given yet another lesson in perspective.

I was riding my motorcycle back through Jasper, Hinton and just about to Edson when there was a dead stop in traffic, a large plume of smoke to the east. Forest fire. My plan to get home to my family tonight has been put to a stand still.

This is an inconvenience, but it could be much worse. Home could be where that fire is raging. The hamlet of Malboro, just west of Edson is being evacuated. I am thankful that I still have a home to go to. This minor inconvenience is nothing compared to what those people are going through right now.

Next time you want to get mad at something that wronged you, just look at the big picture and have compassion for those who are worse off by the same situation.

May

May is always an interesting month for training. It is the first consistently warm month of the year and happens to be when many of our group have other obligations or activities popping up and taking our attention away from kung fu. The thrill and momentum of Chinese New Year is over and the pressure of the deadline next year is still far from people's minds. This is the mental wall, the blockage we get and our motivation is low.

We need to push past this wall, Canada Day will be here sooner than we think, it is a great booster for motivation, a sort of second wind. To benefit from this wind we still need to act now. I haven't seen too many blogs these past couple weeks. Let's get back at it. The more we blog, the more our minds are thinking about our journey, the more we think the more we act, the more we act the more we have to write about. I'd say it is a pretty good first step to getting that momentum back.

Morning and Meeting

The sun is just poking over the trees, casting it's light into my windows. The birds in those trees are chirping, speaking to each other in their peaceful way. The best part is that not too many people are awake yet, the road is quiet of vehicles and the pace around me is still nice and slow. Morning is my favorite part of the day, I think it always has, even as a child, for these reasons. Even if I am awake all night, the sunlight coming up over the horizon is a welcome sight, a new day has arrived.

I want to reflect on how our meeting went yesterday. It was great to sit down and hear how many of us are doing in our journey. This is the reason for these meetings and the reason for our blogs. I know when I started my first year in the I Ho Chuan, I was quite reluctant to speak up at all. I was afraid that what I had to say was unimportant or just plain stupid. However, the years have gone by and I know that even if you think what you want to say has no meaning, say it anyway. It might provide someone else with some insight or strike up a very compelling conversation. I make it a point to say something every meeting now, sometimes with a little too much zeal. (Apologizes for yesterday, I was just very excited about Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance and was a little tired.)

All of this provides another reason the morning is so great, this slower pace allows me to really think and reflect. This thinking and reflecting sets the tone for my day and puts me in a good space mentally. Enjoy the morning everyone, see you when I see you.

Numbers of the Year of the Pig:

Pushups: 12750

Situps: 12750

Acts of Kindness: 362

Wudang Hand Form: 199 reps

Taiji Sword Form: 199 reps

Sparring: 216 rounds

Distance: 1061.7 km

Meditation: 200 minutes

Whistle practice: 17 hours

Books read: 6

Kung Fu movies watched: 6

New Life

Perhaps the most important day of my life happened this week, my daughter was born. My daughter, just saying that is still so surreal. Claire Rose Sollinger was born April 25, 2019. Both her and Mel are recovering amazingly. I had no doubt, Claire clearly gets her toughness and constitution from her mother. I knew this day was coming, but it seemed to come out of nowhere. In the beginning you think that it is so far away and then one day, boom! Time has passed by and here we are!

This is what not looking too far into the future and being purely immersed, enjoying, experiencing what you are doing right now, for the right reasons, is all about. It is nice to look ahead, but keep in mind, that future will only come to fruition if you are in the here and now. No ego, no expectation, just doing your best in a day and what you can't get done today is for tomorrow, but enjoy the tasks of today.

There has been, or will be a massive shift in my perspective of the world. I say 'or will' because I'm not quite sure if it has sunken in completely yet. Why I practice martial arts, or anything for that matter, is different now. It is not just about me and my accomplishments for myself. It is about my accomplishments for my family. I have the responsibility to set an example and adhere to the principles I hold important for my daughter. (Yup, still feels weird.)

My motivation has new life, I truly feel I am grading for the right reasons now.

Ego

This will be an indirect continuation of last weeks post. I thought about how much I thought I knew and just how pleased it made me feel about myself. How ego driven my journey through kung fu has been. A good deal of my time has been an exercise in proving what I can do and how I can excel to those around me. It is one thing to have confidence in one self, but if the motivation to do better is only to climb the mountain just because you can, then there is no substance to the accomplishment.

When you are doing a form with the intent of looking good at it, you are missing the point and in fact not looking good to those who can recognize pure intent over the surface illusion of skill. This approach is in fact counter productive because when you look back at what you have done, you are disappointed because you know you could have done so much better if you simply kept your mind on what you were doing, not how you appeared.

Perhaps I am judging myself too hard. The original motivation for increasing my skill and knowledge may have been my own personal mission to prove how great I can be, but over time it has changed. The question of how much it changed is still in my mind. Sometimes I feel I have made great strides in my approach, creating a more selfless and focused path. Then I reflect on where my mind was the past week and see that I only thought of how I could do better for me, rather than what I can do to influence those around me. How I let my ego poison my perspective of how well I grasp the concepts I am learning.

Even writing this I have a sense of ego, hoping this post is good enough for those reading it. Does it make sense, or am I just shoving words together in another attempt to make myself look good to those around me?

How do you analyze how well you are doing without letting ego into the picture? How do you recognize when you need to improve without looking to the past or future? It must be quite the balancing act, one in which I am still figuring out.

Spaghetti

Words and concepts get thrown at you like spaghetti to a wall. Sometimes it sticks to the wall, but sometimes it takes a long time for anything to. Sometimes even the spaghetti already on the wall gets knocked off by more spaghetti and you need to relearn what have previously.

This week we were explained concepts that I thought I had a good grasp on, only to find out I just scratched the surface. As exciting as this is, it is a little discouraging. I thought I knew what I was doing, but honestly never really had to think about how I am doing what I am doing. This is the double edged sword of being naturally adept at some things. I am going through everything I know and analyzing every minute part, to come up with some sort of rationality to why I move the way I do in my kung fu, what the logic is.

This will be a long process, but is that not what preparing for grading is for? To analyze what you know, what kind of martial artist you are?

Contact

Staying in the moment is very important, but does it get to the point where you are too immersed in the moment? One of my downfalls is keeping in contact with people. I don't necessarily burn bridges, but let them slowly fall into disrepair. This is not done mindfully, I just get so wrapped up in what I am doing that the time goes by without talking.

I accept this as who I am, but still want to make an effort to improve this, especially being that we will live in another province in a couple years or so. I don't wish to lose the friendships I have developed over the past few years in kung fu. Not to mention my relationship with my family.

So my question is, how do you do it? I could start off slow, the odd email or text message to just let my friends know I am still alive. Taking that first step after a long time is scary for some reason. How will the people I haven't maintained contact with react? I could justify it by thinking that they also have not reached out to me, but that is the easy way out.

I will figure it out eventually. This is not something I want to stress over as stress will only make it worse. I just need to take that first baby step.

Impermanence

Impermanence is all around us. It is not just in the living things, but in the non-living things as well. Everything around us is in a constant state of change, even materials that seem to be 100 percent permanent are slowly changing, deteriorating and shifting. It is the nature of the universe to constantly change. Look around, the trees, the sidewalk, even your car is resetting every moment. They are not quite the same objects they were a moment ago. 

I feel this reality of impermanence is why it is so important to stay consistent with your training. Like everything else, you are constantly changing. Your body will react differently to your kung fu than it did yesterday. You can't say, "Well I used to be able to do that this way.", because you are not the same person you were, therefore you need to adapt. 

I find because my physical body and surroundings are in constant flux, my approach and my training must change as to work with the current circumstances and realize that tomorrow I will have to change it again. This keeps it all interesting and I'm just fine with that.

Kicking

The last couple weeks I have been concentrating heavily on my kicks. Quality, consistency and speed. I took an approach to this practice in that I am doing the required number of kicks for the fitness test, no matter how long it takes, instead of seeing how many I can do in a minute. So far I am just over the 1 minute mark across the board. This is a good starting point I feel.

Last Saturday my kicks were fast, but lacked consistency and some quality. I decided to change my stance in one of my kicks and turn my focus back to the basics instead of straight speed. The interesting thing about this is they were not that much slower, but the difference in quality was certainly noticed. I will continue to work purely on the quality and work my time back down. The sacrifice on time is worth it. This goes back to the philosophy that you sometimes need to take a step back and adjust in order to get any further ahead. The sooner you back up, the sooner you can go forward, but with greater proficiency.

Brainstorming

This year, I am quite enthusiastic about developing my 5 applications. These help define you for who you are as a martial artist, your unique approach and spirit. It is one representation of what you can do with what you have learned in your training. I have witnessed some incredible stuff from candidates in past years and will do what I can to meet that standard.

My partner in this endeavor, Jackie Kohut, and I have been putting together some pretty cool techniques. The act of brainstorming, thinking of a move, finding a potential problem with it, and coming up with a solution that makes it better than the first version is what makes it so interesting. It is almost akin to creating a form. It is another reminder, a mirror of sorts, that allows me to analyze my strengths and weaknesses and adapt to them.

New Path

I have experienced emotions this week. My career is taking off soon. I am finally at the point where I can begin working as an EMR. I am excited for this prospect, happy that I took this financial risk and I am now going to reap the benefits. 

All change comes at a cost though. This career path does not work on a Monday to Friday, 8-4 schedule. Because of this I will not be present at the school as consistently. I don't know why I didn't think of this factor when deciding to undertake this. An oversight indeed. I am not by any means regretting my decision. I am just torn between the happiness of starting something new and the sadness of spending less time and energy where I want it, in kung fu. 

This compounded by the fact that this is my grading year. The year I need to spend MORE time at the kwoon, not less. This reduction in time spent also affect the students and other instructors. I am letting them down.

Even though this all sounds negative, I would not change it for anything. This is a mere reflection of where my path is going and how it will help me become a better person, a better martial artist than I thought. This will all contribute to a successful year. With a relatively unknown schedule, I need to take advantage of every free second I have. No time will be squandered. 

Overthinking

The year of the pig has been good to me so far. I have consistent momentum, the kind of momentum I can compare to my first year in the I Ho Chuan. However, it is early days yet, I feel the pressure to make this year unlike any other. This is good pressure, the pressure of accountability, the pressure that comes from knowing what is at stake. Am I going to get done what I promised I would? What if life throws yet another obstacle that threatens my success? This momentum will not last forever. I must create something tangible and sustainable from it that allows me to keep progressing and succeed even when it is not as easy to do so.

So far I have developed a structure that works for me. I have learned a lot from the last several years of trial and error. I know what approaches are conducive to success and which toward failure and yet I can't help but think whether or not my approach will work. Is there a better way? 

Only time will tell. I have been known to overthink things such as this. I just need to slow down, think clearly and do what I need to. Plain and Simple. 

In Writing

There is something about writing down your thoughts as opposed to just trying to remember it or even typing it. The interaction of your hand with the pen and the pen with the paper somehow helps the brain retain what it is you are working on. This is something I have found with me, I can't say for anyone else if this is true, but either way it is a tool I have not used to it's full potential.

This Saturday I finally sat down and worked out the first draft of the majority of my five techniques. It feels so weird now, being on this side of it, after getting slammed on the floor or "maimed" by candidates for years. Don't get me wrong, I have learned so much from these experiences. It is just, like I said, weird. Having a technique partner to bounce ideas back and forth really opened up the possibilities for me as well. Writing down the techniques I had in my head for months was relieving. I have been meaning to write them down, but figured at the time that I could memorize simply by feel. WRONG. Write it down! Not only so if by chance something is forgotten it is easily recovered, but so then it is reinforced in the mind.

This is why I went back to my original method of recording my numbers. The past few years I have been using an app that instantly adds up the total when I add for the day. This became a whole process, "open app, select requirement, add number, go back, next requirement..." and so on. With a journal, it is as simple as opening the page and writing it down. This might have to do with my slight aversion to technology, but that is a whole other post.

My current numbers for the year of the pig:

Pushups 2700
Sit Ups 2700
AOK 81
Meditation Minutes 65
Distance 274 Km
Sparring Rounds 38
Wu Dang Hand Form 30
Wu Dang Taiji Sword 36
Tin Whistle Practice (Hours) 5
Books Finished 1
Kung Fu Movies Watched 0

Ordinary

We all have our sense of normal. This is what makes us unique. No two people are exactly alike. Some are proficient at one thing while other people are proficient at others. Some people seem fortunate enough to be naturally adept in anything they try. Why is there this perception? It seems true, does it not? The truth is, these people are just the same as anyone else. There are things they excel at and things they suck at.

The real difference is, they engage in everything they do. When it comes to what they are not as naturally good at, they engage just a little more. They accept the fact that they are lacking, but do not settle. They ask questions, they put in the effort to truly figure out what they need to do. When they come across adversity, they do not give up, wipe their hands of it and move on to the next thing. They try and fail, try and fail. They have the confidence to keep going until they have the competence to do it well. These people are masters of their own life. They are in control of everything that happens in their lives.

Even if they are not in control in the literal sense, they make changes and adapt to minimize the circumstances that are taking the control away from them. This does not mean to control everyone's life around them, just their own. If the affect of maintaining control over their own life affects those around them, that is simply an after effect. It is usually and preferably a positive effect that encourages us all to remain calm and in control. Masters of life are ordinary, just like you and me. 

I too one day hope to be in control of everything possible in my life, it is my life after all. If I am not in control of it, how can I possibly help others when they are struggling to get control of theirs?

Thank You

First, I want to congratulate everyone on a successful banquet. We all came together and created something very special last night. Something like this is not achieved by one person, but the combined effort of dedicated individuals.

The lion dance was amazing! The fact that we had seven lions on the mats is just mind blowing, SEVEN lions! Most of us were brand new lion dancers and you would not think it. Bravo.

I am relieved that the stack roll was a success. That was a major challenge for sure. It is another example of how to recognize when the technique should be changed. Only once we figured out the proper technique and practiced it repeatedly, did we find success. This success would not have been so easy to achieve if everyone didn't attend practices and improve their technique. Thank you for all your hard work.

I am so proud and grateful to be part of such a mindful and compassionate community. I don't know where I would be right now if it wasn't for Silent River.

Technique

Technique is important. How you accomplish something is just as important as what you are attempting to accomplish. If you don't use proper technique, it can make life more difficult for you than it should be. Using brute force only gets you so far before you either hurt yourself or break whatever you are trying to do.

For instance, I have been having troubles with my spinning back kick for a while and it all boils down to my technique. I tried several different approaches, but did not reach the "aha" moment I was looking for. Recently, it clicked. It was mentioned to me that I didn't use my hips enough. I laughed at myself, of course! Why did I not think of that earlier? Almost everything is generated from the hips. I know it was mentioned to me in the past, why didn't I apply it earlier? With this, the quality of my spinning back kicks, in fact all my kicks, has improved greatly. All because of technique. 

I remember watching a youtube video on how to change motorcycle tires a few years ago. What the person said resonates with me even now, it was along the lines of, "If something seems way more difficult than it should be, you are probably doing it wrong and need to change your approach."  That seed was planted in my brain then and only now am I beginning to truly approach problems with that mindset. 

Success

This week was something special for me. I was presented with a couple tangible representations of my success over the past several months, both of them occurring on the same day.

The morning class on Thursday seemed like any normal one. We worked in stations for the first half, focussing on a particular concept in each.  Followed by forms, specifically 18 temple motions. I did not expect at the end of the class to be promoted. Not that I was slacking, it just caught me off guard when it was announced. I feel different, but at the same time not. I did not instantly progress any faster because of this, it is simply a representation of the progress accumulated over time. All this being said, I am excited to attend my new class!

Later that day, I received a notice that I passed my EMR retest. Again, I was surprised, as I did not expect a response this soon. I can now officially begin my new career! I am already on the hunt for positions.

Now I can concentrate more on what happens next. We are on the cusp of a new year, a year that will have it's own trials and triumphs. This is all very exciting!

The Year of the Dog

I approach the year of the pig a different person. My path in the year of the dog went profoundly different than I was expecting. So many things happened to cause this shift.

In March, a wonderful dog ended up on our doorstep. We took her in and now Freyja is a full fledged member of our family. Through her I learned the value of responsibility for another.

In May, I was involved in a motorcycle accident. The circumstances of which I wish I could have changed, but that would deprive me of the lesson of mortality and caution. It took me a while to get back on a bike after that, but I am grateful for the chance to take what I learned and apply it.

In June I was forced to change jobs, this gave me the opportunity to pursue another career. One that I am still working on entering, I took my EMR retest today and feel confident I succeeded. I learned not to be complacent, no matter what you know, you can always benefit from learning more.

In July, I travelled the entire North American continent with my dad in 13 days on motorcycles. Obviously I had gotten over my accident months before and we proved that such a feat is possible, if you have the will and desire to achieve it.

In September, we found out that we are expecting a child. This brought to light the reality of the chapter ahead of us. I am preparing to become a father. Even typing the words fills me with so much joy. I am learning to actively set my path in front of me so that I may have an easier time guiding my future child on theirs.

The events that transpired this year have changed me for the better. Even though some of them were negative at the time, I feel I have become wiser because of them and can use that wisdom to help me in the future.

My kung fu has benefited greatly from all of this life experience. My ability to think clearly under pressure, change my intent and further commit to ridding my life of mediocrity is at a level I wouldn't think possible this time last year. This has been a great year.

Emotion

Emotion is a funny thing. It can be a distraction or a very useful tool.

When you let your emotions get out of hand, you begin to lose control of your reactions to outside influences. You may make rash decisions and sometimes end up regretting them in the end, which is itself a dangerous emotion to feel.

Emotions also have the power to focus and inspire. When you are fully invested in something, you develop an emotional attachment to it. That attachment drives you to further invest yourself and create something extraordinary.

I greatly invest my emotion in my kung fu. It has been an unyielding ground for me in a constantly changing world. In return, I put all the emotion possible into it. From something as simple as a pushup, to attempting to perfect a form or technique, to helping a student reach their full potential, I embrace it completely.

When you are fully invested, it is noticable. In your actions, words and even your expressions. It makes the difference between, "Hey, that was pretty good.", to, "Wow, that was mind blowing!" It shows that your really care about what you are doing and what it stands for.

Share to the world how much this means to you through your expressions. It will awe and inspire others to achieve their own greatness.

New Year

It is a new year, another tangible tool to help you reset your priorities. The 1000 challenge on new years day gave me new drive to make this my best kung fu year yet. Not only kung fu in it's literal sense, but the principles of kung fu that you take into the environment around you. It reminded me why I joined the I Ho Chuan originally, to see a challenge though to completion.

I am thrilled, yet very nervous about what 2019 has in store, there are so many unknown variables. This is actually a benefit though, it forces me to refocus my attention on what I know now, what I can control now. I am getting progressively better at this, year after year, as I experience the unpredictability of life.